There is so much that one has to learn, how to unlearn what we have done habitually and have been conditioned to do. How not to blame oneself or feel guilty about our conflicting myriad emotions, and how to give unconditional positive regard to others we love, or others in general. How to truly live in the present moment, and not go back critically observing our own or others mistakes. How not to blame oneself and others for all that life throws at us.
The mind never stays still; it’s constantly asking us questions, giving answers and then criticizing and creating doubt and fear in our hearts. There are such times when my heart constricts due to the fear instilled in it by my mind. I meditate and pray, all in an effort to quieten my mind. At times I succeed, at times my mind gets the better of me.
I have beautiful friends whom I reach out to, each comforts in her own way. Today one such friend reminded me what support and love is. I made a new friend hardly two weeks ago, and today I feel I have known her for ever. I felt a soul connection and confided in her my fears and worries and all that I felt I couldn’t share with anyone. She also shared her “life stuff” with me, it seemed so natural to talk without pretense and the fear of being condemned or judged.
This new friend showed me today that validation is so important. She showed me by validating me and consoling me and shooing away my worst fears and negative thoughts. I thought I was aware and mindful, but I realized that I pay lip service to the concept of “living in the present moment” that in my low points in life, how easily I slip into the past, dwelling on the past mistakes, past blames and worries.
Love and validation make me hopeful again for a better tomorrow. Thats all I need to focus on, today and tomorrow’s sunrise. Life has to go on and it will.